How To Handle Being Homesick

   I've realised that recently I haven't done any proper blog posts of how to handle being an actual student, I've written more about my recent experiences. Therefore, for my next few posts I'm going to focus more on what to expect as a student and how to deal with those situations. As a student myself I feel I would have benefited having more advice on what to expect and how to cope with it, which is why I'm going to do it for prospective students.
   I've mentioned being homesick a few times in previous posts, and therefore I thought this should be the issue I first tackle. Regardless of how often you tell yourself you won't get homesick and you won't miss your parents because they've driven you crazy and you want to be away from them, trust me, you will get homesick at some point. It's different for everyone how long it takes to hit them, so I can't give you a precise time, but for most people it tends to be either after the first couple of months, or in the lead up to Christmas.
   The first major thing you need to remember, is that you shouldn't be embarrassed because you're homesick. Everyone will get homesick at some point, some people will just be better at keeping it behind closed doors than others. It's nothing to be embarrassed of, no matter how close or far away you are from home, you're away from your parents who've looked after you for the past 18 years, so it's going to be a bit of a shock having to fend for yourself all of a sudden! Thankfully, there are several really simple steps to help you deal with it and prevent you from becoming an emotional mess.

Skype/Facetime/Phone Call
   The first, and probably the most obvious solution is to get in contact with them. I know this doesn't work for everyone as for some people seeing or talking to their parents will make it worse, but I find that this really works for me as hearing their voices and seeing them puts me at ease.
   Some people may not want to actually see their parents, and therefore a phone call would be the best solution as you'll be able to hear them and talk to them without having to actually look at them. However, other people will prefer to be able to actually see them, as it makes it seem almost as if they're actually there with you.
   It's amazing how much a phone call can change how you feel. Just hearing or seeing them and being able to find comfort in that is often enough to tie people over until they can next see their parents, as you have heard or seen that they are well, and that they miss you just as much as you miss them!

Friends
   Spending time with your new university friends is a great way to take your mind off being homesick, as they most likely don't have any connections with your home and consequently you don't associate them with it. Throwing yourself into university life and focusing on having a laugh with them and enjoying yourself is sure to take your mind off home, not permanently, but long enough for the initial aching pang to go away.
Chances are that they are probably homesick too, so by spending time together you'll be able to help take each other's minds off it. Seriously, you won't be the only one in your friendship group who's homesick.

Day Out/Weekend Visit
   If you've gone to a university quite close to home then this is an obvious and easy option. Simply pop on the train, or get your parents to, and either go home for the day or the weekend, or get them to come to you! Spending a day or couple of days with them will make you feel better and then you'll be ready to go back to university feeling a lot happier having seen them.
   For people like me, being 150 miles away from home, this is an absolute last resort. Therefore, try the previous two steps first to see if they help, and if they don't and you truly are desperately homesick then arrange with your parents to either go home or for them to come and visit. My parents have visited twice and it's been so lovely to have them here rather than me go home, and I've found I've been much less homesick after they've left than I have been coming back to Manchester after visiting home. I love being able to show them round Manchester and it just helps to make me feel a lot more settled and remind myself that actually I am coping really well on my own.
   Similarly, if you have friends at universities nearby then arrange to see them! Jess and I were both getting a bit homesick, and as she's only an hour away on the train I popped up to visit her for the day and we both felt so much better for it! Seeing someone from home, despite being in completely new surroundings, was so lovely, and it definitely helped us both through to when we could next see our families.

   As I've reiterated several times throughout this post, there is no way you are going to be the only person who's homesick. It's simply a case of it hitting different people at different times and being handling things in different ways, but it will hit them eventually. You definitely shouldn't be ashamed just because you only lasted a week before you got homesick whereas your flat mate has lasted 3 months, because chances are deep down he's homesick, he's just putting on a front and telling himself he isn't so he doesn't have to face the ache you feel, because it's not pleasant being homesick.
   It's also important that you remember that your parents will be missing you just as much as you're missing them, they're not going to have forgotten about you just because you've gone to university! The house will be very quiet without you and they're going to be adapting to massive changes just like you are. My three steps will hopefully enough to get you through being homesick, and make you feel much better and ready to continue developing as an independent adult.